You gotta laugh

I reckon I stood next to The Most Annoying Man Ever at Coltishall a couple of weeks back. Jabbering on to no-one in particular, with his hair dyed bright red and wearing a jacket like the Castrol GTX one Alan Partridge wears to the funeral in one episode. I don’t recall specifics about what he was saying, just that everything he said was wrong, and there was much sniggering among the rest of the enthusiasts…

This year at the Florida International Air Show, Charlottesville. “and this ladies and gentlemen is a British World War 2 Jet aeroplane called the Vickers Vampire”.

Not an airshow but a Norbert in my local going back 20 years or so, who claimed he had been a Navy Officer on board the old HMS Ark Royal when it was equipped with Lightnings. I tried to explain, but to no avail. In the end I accepted his story and nodded knowingly !!!!

My Dad, an MT Corporal at Little Staughton during the latter part of WW2 was sent to St Neots to recover an RAF bomb (Not fused – of course) that had fallen from a lorry on its way through East Anglia.

They were just winching it onto the back of the three-tonner when he heard a passer-by claiming to have heard the German bomber that had dropped the bomb the night before.

Moggy

How about funny things ya see at airshows…..
Like the woman in the one piece VERY WHITE pantsuit outfit thing who was stood right behind TFC’s P47 when it was backed up to the fence line & fired up…..

That reminded me of a display at Coventry when Jeff Hawke was displaying his highly disreputable, as far as condition was concerned, B25 Mitchell. Again it was parked tail on to the crowd and fairly adjacent. When his slot time approached he cranked the bird up and as it fired a fat slug of oil, probably in excess of a gallon, shot out of the exhaust pipe and splattered over those numerous folk clustered behind it. Fortunately the blatter of the Wright Cyclone drowned out the wails of those who were decorated but the show organiser must have forked out loads of dosh for dry cleaning bills. I doubt if Jeff would have bothered…………..!!!!!!!!!!!

Cheers,

Trapper 69
:diablo: :diablo: :diablo: 😮 😮 :p

Not mine, but from my stepfather (who was a TSGT/aircrew on EC-135’s with the 6th ACCS back in the late 70s)…

They had flown down to Rosy Roads for some kind of TDY assignment, and as the EC-135 was an electronic surveillance job, they got the “rope off” and sentry treatment. The young Marine sentry wasn’t the brightest crayon in the box though… and my stepfather Terry took full advantage, it must be said.

The sentry spotted Terry exiting the aircraft and decided to make small talk. He pointed to the refuelling drogue stored beneath the aircraft, and asked “What’s that?” Terry politely explained that this was a submarine anti-buoyancy device… they would fly low and slow over the water, dragging this device in the water. This would cause all the Russian submarines to come to the surface, where they’d then be shot with the laser cannons on the wingtips (pointing to the large probes mounted on each wingtip of the 135).

The sentry was wide-eyed in astonishment, and thereafter stood a very close watch over the “laser-equipped” aircraft while Terry and the crew went and got drunk somewhere. 🙂

Still cracks him up almost thirty years later. 🙂

Lynn

Cherish the memory of John Blake who was commentating at a Biggin Hill Air Show in the 1960’s when Neil Williams did his final manoeuver in a Tiger Club Stampe SV4B. It was a negative snap roll from erect to erect at but 300 feet agl. It went flat for the first time though all of us had predicted that it would sometime. Neil finished with zero speed pointing vertically down at a perilously low height. John’s comment was so apt – “Neil is taking the Stampe behind the hangar……………………and leaving it there..!!” as a cloud of dust rose into the sky followed by a muffled sound of an elephant jumping onto a pile of tea chests. One Stampe totalled and one Williams with a lot of bruises and a broken collar bone; still strapped into the seat quite separate from the other bits and pieces.
Cheers,
Trapper 69
:diablo: :diablo: :diablo: :diablo: 😮 😮 😮

I was up on Grumpy’s wing one day when some guy asked if it was an Abermarle (sp?), I told him it was a B25 & he got a bit agitated & started arguing with me about it….

How about funny things ya see at airshows…..
Like the woman in the one piece VERY WHITE pantsuit outfit thing who was stood right behind TFC’s P47 when it was backed up to the fence line & fired up…..

Big crowd under the B52 wing using it as a sunshade when suddenly the bomb bay doors start to open…. people starting to look a bit unsettled.. edging away from the plane and then……

… a bath sponge falls out & blows along the ramp closely followed by some Colonial Air Force guy who was inside cleaning it up….

Overheard at Duxford. Child exclaiming:
“Look its a Spitfire. It must be the end of the show”.

Commentator at Oshkosh ’94 or ’96 as TE308 was flying.
“This is the only two-seat Spitfire in the world”
Well, maybe in [b]his[/b] world it was.

Come on Melvyn, even you were young once though I did hear you were born complete with anorak………………….only joking I do assure you…….!!!
Cheers,
Trapper 69
“Rear wins for ever” – as the Bishop said to the curate.

I remember helping out at the Blackpool RAF Town Show and one of the exhibits was the replica Nimrod fuselage, we were constantly asked if it was a submarine! One smart alec, when he spyed the wheels of the two trailers it was made up of, said they were for when the pilot wants to land it on the seabed!

OK we have all overhead people making stupid comments at airshows/museum’s etc so feel free to share some of those that made you laugh the most.

Overheard some people talking about me at a certain Museum in Dayton, OH

“Why’s he getting so excited about a piece of sheet metal?”

The “sheet metal” was the B-17 fin section that had been part of someone’s barn in Germany until 1996 or thereabouts. I’d been reading about it for years. (I subsequently saw its picture on the museum website)

I’m glad they didn’t see me when I realised I was staring at one of “Lady Be Good”‘s engines in another part of the museum.

Laugh? I almost bought a hamburger.

R/K

Quote

Rather like being on the forum sometimes then . . .

A couple of my favourite quotes which seem relevant (almost)

1. “If we knew what we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?” – Albert Einstein,

2. “There’s no sense in being precise when you don’t even know what you’re talking about.” – John von Neumann,

and O/T:

“The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us” – Bill Watterson.

But entirely true

Rather like being on the forum sometimes then . . .

eheheheh that was nasty 😀

Alex

I love walking through the crowd listening to the people who think they know what they are talking about!

Rather like being on the forum sometimes then . . .

Commentator at East Fortune in 1998, as Ray and Mark Hanna were doing their best trying to shoot eachother down, kept commenting that the Buchon had a Daimler-Benz engine, and insisted it was a Bf109G! (Well, I suppose he was theoretically correct :rolleyes: )

There was a similar thread a while back…

Legends 2003 (Ithink), the Flypast lair. Bloke sitting behind me, every time his wife mentioned Sally B, with increasing unpleasantness he said “that’s Pink Lady”. Finally Sally B taxied out and behind me “I wonder if Sally B’s going up too?” I pointed out there was only one B.17 there, it was right in front of us and as it said Sally B on the nose in big letters it was a fair bet it wasn’t Pink Lady. Very peaceful for the rest of the show.

I’m sure I’ve come out with my own fair share of inanities, but fortunately I can’t remember any of them. 🙂

I attended for a good 2 years at airshows as pilot/crew of a Tiger Moth trio, and we were often asked to park near to the audience, as we always allowed people to come near, have pics, make questions etc… It’s one of my most favorite moments, since some people have an incredible imagination, and above all it gives u an idea of what’s the real interest and knowledge of people. Three pearls from the last time I attended one:

1)The most common, pointing the finger to the flag and roundels “why it’s an english plane and has french insignas”?
2)A child to his friend, pointing at the Sperry compass “Look! They even got radars on!”
3)A dad to his son, pointing the Venturi “U see the machinegun there?”
4)My favorite, because it has been said by a self-declared aeronautical engineer.. pointing the finger at the windy on the left wing strut and talking to his girl”u see? that is a G-meter, which is supposed to measure the G load of the plane!”

Alex

Two of my cadets were actually on the Merlin at the time. was not a happy bunny. 😡 I actually was amazed by the fact that they were asked to do this as if they had the cadets would have been dropped 50ft smack on to Tarmac, alot of Paperwork and the press would of had a field day. Last year had a problem with a cadet trying to chase after the BBMF Spit 😮 he told me he was trying to help. I had to tell him the RAF are professionals leave it to them. The cadet proceeded to explain he had done his work experience at Duxford i turned and said. ‘So have I doesnt give us the divine right to go running down the runway.’ cadets eh? :rolleyes:

If it brings money in it helps, but did notice at Southend a Callsign used by the tower which should of been used to the Hercules crew instead of the Merlin.

I noticed that – especially as ATC cleared the Merlin to throw all it’s passengers out regardless of whether were strapped to parachutes or not!