‘she says “I was a terrible wife, and then I blew it as a lesbian” and he says “maybe thats where you went wrong?”‘ Brilliant.

The thing is some comedians who swear are funny, and there are others who also swear and are awful. Fact of life. It’s also the same for those who don’t swear: there are funny ones, like Tim Vine, and those that aren’t, like Ricky Gervais.

Before I go here’s a joke I was told recently:

When I was at Uni, I tried really, really hard to like fetish clothing. The problem was, I just couldn’t get into it. 😉

Any really early racing car

To me, any of the really early racing cars like the pre war Delages, Bugattis, Alfas, Le Mans Bentleys, etc. It took some serious guts to race them. Even today, when they’re raced in historic events, my hat goes off to the drivers.

Discovering last Sunday I had appendicitis. Five days of agony and s***e hospital food. Oh, and missing several important in class tests because of it.

I am sorry I’ve been away, appendicitis. Five straight days of pain and hospital food. :mad::mad::mad: Would anyone mind if I have the next post after Wout has posted his?

That a small jolt, or knock can damage an unbreakable piece of equipment.

Wherever Poirot goes on holiday you can guarantee there will be a murder.

In an action sequence, any innocent bystander will always just get out of a car before it explodes/ is crushed by a tank etc.

Midsomer has more murders per 100 people than certain areas of Manchester.

Any Brit in an American show is either an Upper-class twit a la Boris Johnson, or a Cockney.

In a war film “ze Germans vill be most of ze time speeking ze Eeenglish”

Three opticians walk into a bar. Surely one of them should have seen it.

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first goes up to the bartender and says, “I’ll have a pint of lager, please.” The next one says, “and I’ll have half of what he’s having.” The bartender says, “You’re all idiots,” and pulls two pints.

Koyaanisqatsi, with music by Philip Glass. One of the most thought-provoking films I have ever seen.

Finishing that politics essay.