The weirdest song lyrics?

Hardly weird though…;o)

Not like, for example, (There’ll Be Bluebirds Over) The White Cliffs of Dover, which is just crazy! Written by Americans Walter Kent and Nat Burton, there is more chance of John Green winning his initial election than wild Bluebirds being seen naturally flying over the south east Kent coastline.

https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CDEQtwIwAg&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DUODI6JmUnMA&ei=um_uU824HfSO7Aa92YE4&usg=AFQjCNFMoGElFXyxHHzeQHXu38RhXGpPjg&sig2=SMUWy9k_Mkv_7VUKMTQ5JQ

Paul Simon and George Harrison (surely one of the nicest rock stars ?)

Weird song ? not really – lovely bit of songwriting but supposedly written on Widnes station (or nearby) but would an american use ‘Railway Station’ at home ??

Simon is quoted as saying “if you’d ever seen Widnes, then you’d know why I was keen to get back to London as quickly as possible.”

I’m sitting in the railway station.
Got a ticket for my destination.
On a tour of one-night stands my suitcase and guitar in hand.
And every stop is neatly planned for a poet and a one-man band.

[Chorus]
Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought’s escaping,
Home where my music’s playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.

Every day’s an endless stream
Of cigarettes and magazines.
And each town looks the same to me,
The movies and the factories
And every stranger’s face I see reminds me that I long to be,

[Chorus]

Tonight I’ll sing my songs again,
I’ll play the game and pretend.
But all my words come back to me in shades of mediocrity
Like emptiness in harmony I need someone to comfort me.

Me – I am just a lawnmower 😀

It’s one o’clock and time for lunch,
When the sun beats down and I lie on the bench,
I can always hear them talk.

There’s always been Ethel:
“Jacob, wake up! You’ve got to tidy your room now.”
And then Mister Lewis:
“Isn’t it time that he was out on his own?”
Over the garden wall, two little lovebirds – cuckoo to you!
Keep them moving blades sharp…

I know what I like, and I like what I know;
getting better in your wardrobe, stepping one beyond your show.

Sunday night, Mr Farmer called, said:
“Listen son, you’re wasting your time; there’s a future for you
in the fire escape trade. Come up to town!”
But I remebered a voice from the past;
“Gambling only plays when you’re winning”
– I had to thank old Miss Mort for schooling a failure.
Keep them moving blades sharp…

I know what I like, and I like what I know;
getting better in your wardrobe, stepping one beyond your show.

When the sun beats down and I lie on the bench,
I can always hear them talk.
Me, I’m just a lawnmower – you can tell me by the way I walk.

…that’s the only explanation for the success of Rap music…

Not strictly true.
The late, great, John Peel claimed that the music of todays generation should offend their parents – and as a parent I am offended by the popular artists of today who generally karaoke to a backing track on stage. That is not to say that rap music works in that fashion: my eldest will try and blast us with Eminem at his sweariest when he wants to annoy, and from such forced listenings I can feel the anger of a working class youth lost in the aggressiveness of the inner city. NWA and Public Enemy told of their lives in California or New York, being hassled by the police because of their colour and other gangs for block supremacy; lots of it was more of a social commentary than boasting about being the best rapper or slagging off the ex-wife (as seems to be mainly the case with Eminem). Sure they also sang misogynistic lyrics and had sexist video’s but to those who felt the songs were about them, who felt they were the soundtrack to their lives, rap was the greatest thing ever – and if you told them you hated their music then that would please them too.
Not that I understand much of what they say – it just sounds like noise most of the time.

Now, if my kids were into One Direction or Justin Bieber that would really offend me…

I think there’s often an “Emperor’s New Clothes” factor to this kind of thing. Impressionable kids hear this stuff and instead of recognising it as the rubbish it often is, they think it must be something deeply significant or symbolic that is way over their heads. Rather than admit that they don’t understand it, they pretend to lap it all up, hoping no one will see through them. IMHO that’s the only explanation for the success of Rap music, which all too often is just a string of rhyming words. I remember as a kid, me and my mates telling our parents that they were just too old to really understand some of the more unusual Beatles stuff such as “I am The Walrus” and “Come Together” like we supposedly did, but now of course I recognise it as just gibberish.

http://www.amiright.com/real/nonartist/beatles.shtml

All very weird, true, but how about we keep it to the sort of ‘popular’ music you might actually hear once in a while on the radio? I say this because I heard on the radio today Blinded By The Light, a Bruce Springsteen song successfully covered by Manfred Mann’s Earth Band in 1976 – and a more weird chart-toppin’ song lyric you couldn’t hope to hear…

Madman drummers bummers,
Indians in the summer
with a teenage diplomat
In the dumps with the mumps
as the adolescent pumps
his way into his hat
With a boulder on my shoulder,
feelin’ kinda older,
I tripped the merry-go-round

With this very unpleasin’,
sneezin’ and wheezin,
the calliope crashed to the ground

I know that a merry-go-round and a calliope can be one and the same (unless you are into Greek mythology and know that she was an erotic poetry muse) but there does seem to be rather a lot of nonsensical rhyming, and just what is the adolescent pumping into his hat?

I now expect to find most of U2s back catalogue proclaimed as weird…;o)

From Trout Mask Replica by Captain Beefheart, which I once bought and played to prove how cool I was. “Once” being the operative word…

NEON MEATE DREAM OF A OCTAFISH

lucid tentacles test and sleeved
and joined and jointed jade pointed
diamond back patterns
neon meate dream of an octafish
artifact on rose petals
and flesh petals and pots
fack and feast and tubes tubs bulbs
in jest incest injest injust in feast incest
and specks and spreckled spreckled
speckled speculation
fedlocks waddling feast
archaic faces frenzy
ceramic fists artificial deceased
and cists rancid buds burst
dank drum and dung dust
meate rose and hairs
meaty dream wet meate
limp damp rows
peeled and felt fields and belts
impaled on a demon
mucus mules
**** trot tra la
tra la [3x]
whalebone fields and belts
whalebone farmhouse
cavorts girdled in tatters a lite [2x]
a dipped amidst
squirming serum and semen
and syrup and semen and serum
stirrupped in syrup
neon meate dream of an octafish

Hi All,
Surprised nobody put this blinder in – Oh Superman by Laurie Anderson. :highly_amused:

O Superman. O judge. O Mom and Dad. Mom and Dad.
O Superman. O judge. O Mom and Dad. Mom and Dad.
Hi. I’m not home right now. But if you want to leave a
message, just start talking at the sound of the tone.
Hello? This is your Mother. Are you there? Are you
coming home?
Hello? Is anybody home? Well, you don’t know me,
but I know you.
And I’ve got a message to give to you.
Here come the planes.
So you better get ready. Ready to go. You can come
as you are, but pay as you go. Pay as you go.

And I said: OK. Who is this really? And the voice said:
This is the hand, the hand that takes. This is the
hand, the hand that takes.
This is the hand, the hand that takes.
Here come the planes.
They’re American planes. Made in America.
Smoking or non-smoking?
And the voice said: Neither snow nor rain nor gloom
of night shall stay these couriers from the swift
completion of their appointed rounds.

‘Cause when love is gone, there’s always justice.
And when justive is gone, there’s always force.
And when force is gone, there’s always Mom. Hi Mom!

So hold me, Mom, in your long arms. So hold me,
Mom, in your long arms.
In your automatic arms. Your electronic arms.
In your arms.
So hold me, Mom, in your long arms.
Your petrochemical arms. Your military arms.
In your electronic arms

Geoff.

It was interesting how back in the 60s and early 70s, how much got past the BBC Censors.
As a lot of the weird lyrics related to drugs use. Bob Dylan’s Mr Tambourine Man for instance.

Because, obviously, you are not a goat?

Or a kid…

Mares eat oats
And Does eat oats
And little lambs eat ivy.
l

A kid’ll eat ivy, too, wouldn’t you

No, I wouldn’t.

Edgar,

Mares eat oats
And Does eat oats
And little lambs eat ivy.

Silver fox

Guy in a club at a wild night, pretty drunk, trying to get the girl.. tries all his charm/tricks, fails…girl goes home and realises the wild nights are killing her.
Apart from “16 Vestal Virgins leaving for the coast” (the girls not intending to get laid that night) it is all fairly literal. 😉 (if you know the sixties 🙂 )

regards

Darryl

Mairzy doats

Amazed this one wasn’t in the “top ten” of wierd lyrics, hear the words not a clue what they are on about.

Haven’t heard that one before. I reckon you made it up !

I remain unconvinced that any thing they were ‘saying’ was actually worth the bother of listening to :sleeping:

Understand that you’re quite upset
Whaddya you say that you forgive and forget?
Come on and kiss me just to show you’re glad
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, don’cha go
‘way mad

Now, don’cha go away mad

Frank Sinatra – Don’Cha Go ‘Way Mad

Well whatever you think of them, whatever your taste, the fact remains it was possible to understand what they were saying.

All I now hear is white noise. Maybe it’s time for a visit to Specsavers.

Just about anything by Marc Bolan (T. Rex). Here’s an example, this is called New York City.

Did you ever see a woman
Coming out of New York City
With a frog in her hand

Did you ever see a woman
Coming out of New York City
With a frog in her hand

I did don’t you know [3x]
And don’t it show

From moderately amusing:

“Little red wagon, little red bike,
I ain’t no monkey but I know what I like”…

….to full on “Whiskey Tango Foxtrot??”

“The ghost of Belle Starr she hands down her wits
To Jezebel the nun she violently knits
A bald wig for Jack the Ripper who sits
At the head of the chamber of commerce”

“Uncle Bob” always has had a way with words….

… Matt Munro, Frank Sinatra, Sarah Vaughan and Ella Fitzgerald plus a few others.

The moment I hear someone on the radio wittering about “The great American song book” I know the time has come to switch off very fast.

But then if we all liked the same etc etc …….

Moggy