This is funny:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhJQp-q1Y1s
This is not…
Irish girl sought after fish-slapping incident in Lancashire
Police in England are searching for an Irish teenager who is said to have slapped a shop worker across the face with a large fish.
CCTV images of a teenage boy and girl have been released by Lancashire Constabulary after the worker was slapped across the face with a bream.
The incident took place on 4 February at a supermarket on Hyndburn Road, Accrington.
Lancashire Constabulary described the incident as “completely unacceptable”.
In a statement, the police said the 52-year-old victim was working behind the fish counter when a young woman approached to ask about different fish.
“Without warning, the woman has picked up a large bream from the fish stall and slapped the worker across the face before running out of the store,” said the statement from Lancashire Constabulary.
“The victim believes the incident was being filmed on a mobile phone by a man stood nearby who also ran from the scene when challenged.”
The girl is described as being Irish and aged between 15 and 18 with “blonde, shoulder-length untidy hair”.
She was wearing dark jeans and a blue coat with white cuffs, white down the front and a red collar with ‘I love PB’ on the left breast pocket.
The boy is described as being about the same age, 5ft 8 tall, wearing a dark coat and dark grey trousers and boots.
PC Graham Hartley said: “This behaviour is completely unacceptable and I would appeal to anybody that witnessed this incident or recognises either the man or the woman pictured in the CCTV images to come forward.”
Have you ever been assaulted with an expired aquatic creature?
By: TonyT - 3rd March 2014 at 19:18
I suppose they will be arrested for a salt and batteredry
By: charliehunt - 3rd March 2014 at 19:02
I think the whole story is a red herring.
By: TonyT - 3rd March 2014 at 18:54
I suppose if they received a cut from the slap they would need to consult a sturgeon
By: trumper - 3rd March 2014 at 18:41
Joking apart,a dead fish in a very cold state is probably the same as being walloped with a lump of wood only a lot smellier.I would think getting the slime and scales off wasn’t nice either.
Spit test kits are available at my works if needed.
There’s a Plaice for her in a prison somewhere 🙂
By: TonyT - 3rd March 2014 at 18:27
Could have been worse she could have kicked them in the cod piece
By: 1batfastard - 3rd March 2014 at 18:05
Hi All,
Didn’t the assailants use an OPEL MANTA to escape and weren’t some fitted with a TURBOT :highly_amused:
Geoff.
By: hampden98 - 3rd March 2014 at 17:57
Maybe she is Hungarian http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhJQp-q1Y1s
By: John Green - 3rd March 2014 at 17:53
Merriment apart – this neither the tiime nor the place to do the conger.
By: John Green - 3rd March 2014 at 17:49
This is all codswallop
By: Jonesy - 3rd March 2014 at 17:37
An assault is an assault is an assault. You might not end up dead, or with broken bones or fewer teeth, but you have still been assaulted.
No it isnt. Not by a long shot.
…then again though I suppose we must be mindful of the slippery slope argument….today its a bream….tomorrow she could be holding up Safeways with a loaded turbot….who knows where it could end up?. A high school classroom massacre with a brace of Conger Eels??. We must think of the children eh Snafu….think of the children???! :rolleyes:
By: 1batfastard - 3rd March 2014 at 17:22
Hi All,
Next news will be the assailants claim the victim was just muff diving! I have heard that stinks of fish to :highly_amused:
Geoff.
By: charliehunt - 3rd March 2014 at 17:18
No doubt the judge would pass sentence based on a suitable tarif scale…..:highly_amused:
(Don’t worry…coat on…already leaving the building)
Paul F
Don’t keep carping on about it!
By: snafu - 3rd March 2014 at 17:14
…a slightly different interpretation of ‘assault’…
An assault is an assault is an assault. You might not end up dead, or with broken bones or fewer teeth, but you have still been assaulted.
This morning I heard on the radio that traffic wardens in Southend have been issued with DNA collecting kits to help convict people who assault them by spitting at them. In the past attempts to bring such cases to court were dismissed due to lack of evidence and eyewitnesses making claims, for example, that her husband hadn’t spat at the warden (although in that case was actually caught on CCTV and he was convicted). Do you believe that spitting at somebody is as much an assault as stabbing or swearing at them?
Male rape (by women) used to be laughed out of court because the general opinion was that any man would be happy to enter a sexual union and surely wouldn’t turn down such an offer. And, of course, no man is going to admit in court that he was less of a man for letting a woman molest him unless there was something wrong with him… Even further back it was the same with men raping men – he must have wanted it, he could have just turned away or closed his legs so he must have been a willing participant…
By: Paul F - 3rd March 2014 at 17:01
It all smacks of something fishy if you ask me………
No doubt the judge would pass sentence based on a suitable tarif scale…..:highly_amused:
(Don’t worry…coat on…already leaving the building)
Paul F
By: charliehunt - 3rd March 2014 at 16:54
It all smacks of something fishy if you ask me………
By: Jonesy - 3rd March 2014 at 16:49
Yes, ha ha.
The difference between the two is that the Monty Python video is, um, between two consenting adults whilst the other was an unconsented criminal assault.
Absolutely….but in comparison to the wannabe Reggie Kray in the bar who smashes a bottle in someones face for looking at him funny….I’d suggest that this heinous assault with the aforementioned fish warrants a slightly different interpretation of ‘assault’ wouldnt you?!. Not, perhaps, a crime that we need to reopen the dark tower for?.
By: charliehunt - 3rd March 2014 at 16:39
True but I still cannot resist a muffled laugh!
By: snafu - 3rd March 2014 at 16:09
Yes, ha ha.
The difference between the two is that the Monty Python video is, um, between two consenting adults whilst the other was an unconsented criminal assault.
By: Jonesy - 3rd March 2014 at 15:55
Although you have to admit that it comes pretty close to the first example……particularly the reference to the fish being a bream, which I have never thought of as being a large fish!
Ex wife threw a can of tuna at me once…not sure that counts?. Got to admit, had I witnessed said bream related slapping, I may have chortled slightly before agreeing that as a mature and sensible adult you cannot condone such actions.
By: charliehunt - 3rd March 2014 at 15:41
Although you have to admit that it comes pretty close to the first example……particularly the reference to the fish being a bream, which I have never thought of as being a large fish!
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March 3, 2014 at 3:36 pm