A man wakes up one morning to find a gorilla on
his roof.

So he looks in the yellow pages and sure
enough, there’s an ad for “Gorilla Removers.”

He calls the number, and the gorilla remover says
he’ll be over in 30 minutes.

The gorilla remover arrives, and gets out of his
van. He’s got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun
and a mean old pit bull.

“What are you going to do”, the homeowner asks?

“I’m going to put this ladder up against the
roof, then I’m going to go up there and knock
the gorilla off the roof with this baseball bat.
When the gorilla falls off, the pit bull is
trained to grab his testicles and not let go.
The gorilla will then be subdued
enough for me to put him in the cage in the back
of the van.” He hands the shotgun to the homeowner.

“What’s the shotgun for?” asks the homeowner.

“If the gorilla knocks me off the roof, shoot
the dog!”

A man’s walking home late at night when he sees a woman in the shadows. “Twenty bucks,” she says. He’s never been with a hooker before, but he decides what the hell. They’re going at it for a minute when all of a sudden a light flashes on them—it’s a police officer. “What’s going on here, people?” asks the officer. “I’m making love to my wife,” the man answers indignantly. “Oh, I’m sorry,” says the cop, “I didn’t know.” “Well,” said the man, “neither did I until you shined that light in her face

Boom Tish

A clean one

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.

“My dog’s cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?”

“Well,” says the vet, “Let’s have a look at him.”

So he picks the dog up and has a good look at its eyes.

“Well, “says the vet, “I’m going to have to put him down.”

“What? because he’s cross-eyed?”

“No, because he’s bloody heavy.”

If you are amused by the ‘antics’ of the presenters then it probably is side-splitting.

I don’t mind then speaking their minds one little bit, but broadcasting totally incorrect ‘facts’ to support their prejudices to me, is one step too far.

But this is not a topic we’ll ever agree on. Some people enjoy watching it, others think it’s a tired, dreary novelty programme well past its sell-by date.

So let’s sit back and watch the Spitfire edition and pray they manage to get one or two bits right. I’d hope the aircraft operators have some input.

Moggy

Facts smacts if i want facts i will read a book [I can you know ] If i want some mindless entertainment [ yes i know i am mindless ] i will watch a programme like Top Gear ,you know i dont automatically beleive everything i see on T.V, but it is fun .
Horses for courses and all that

I concur!

I concour his concour Clarkson ,Hammond and May are the best thing on T.V these days long may they continue.
And they always have a bit of aviation in there somewhere.

BTW what is the significance of the Freddie Mercury statue ? Iknow ithat Montreaux has some connection to Queen but what is it ?

I’m afraid whenever i hear the name Montreaux all i can hear is that song !!

Thanks for hijacking a genuine thread guys 😡

I will consider myself truly chastised many apologies